


Shikamaru: Women are Troublesome!

by MLLu



Series: Naruto: Childhood Memories [2]
Category: Boruto: Naruto Next Generations, Naruto
Genre: Children, Family, Fun, Gen, Humor, Ino Yamanaka - Freeform, Morality, Naruto Universe - Freeform, Pre-Canon, Pre-Naruto Canon Era, Shikaku Nara - Freeform, Shikamaru Nara - Freeform, Yoshino Nara - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-29
Updated: 2018-05-29
Packaged: 2019-05-15 17:10:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,913
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14794562
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MLLu/pseuds/MLLu
Summary: It’s Shikamaru day off but the day is not spent in front of the tv, mangas or in bed. Frankly, it’s quite the opposite and he is not getting a break. This is a story about Shikamaru and his relationship with women.





	Shikamaru: Women are Troublesome!

**Author's Note:**

> Published: 1st May 2009

_"Knock, knock."_

Knocks came outside of Shikamaru's bedroom door. With no response to the first three, many more followed with insistence, causing Shikamaru to move exasperatingly in his bed. The noise was like a bomb going off in his head again and again. He turned his face to the side of the bed to cover his ear and when that didn't work, he put his pillow above his other ear. To make his "hide-out" even more soundproof, he threw his white velvety duvet over his entire body. Lying there like a dead fish, Shikamaru began drooling without noticing it. He simply couldn't be bothered to answer the voice outside his bedroom door, because all he wanted was to sleep.

_It's Saturday morning? … Or is it Sunday?_

_Either way it's a weekend!_

Some children liked to play at the playground in Konohagakure, some liked to pay a visit to their friends and family and others enjoy being occupied with their hobbies on a weekend. Shikamaru – He likes to laze his time by sleeping in his bed. Sometimes, he did not understand why people were so active, especially on a weekend. Weekends were supposed to be days with no homework, no duties to fulfill, one where you could stay home, eat some sweets and then go back to sleep. That's the idea of it!

"Please go away. I'm busy…" He said with an extremely tired voice, this time feeling something wet running down his jaw as he spoke. Shikamaru wiped the slobber off with the back of his hand and fell right back to sleep. However, he got disturbed once again.

"Hey, Shikamaru?" Shikamaru's father, Shikaku, asked his son outside the door.

"Yes…dad? Do you have something on your mind?" A mumbled voice came under the wetted duvet, "If not, please stop talking. I want to lay here in my bed all day." He said and took a deep breath at the end of the sentence.

"If you don't wake up right now, you know that there will be a hell to pay," Shikamaru's dad said calmly. He was trying to scare Shikamaru, "and you and I both know that I can't do anything when your mother starts scolding."

That's true. Not even the man who was supposed to be the leader in the house could stop his mother's temper when it broke loose. Sometimes Shikamaru wondered why his father ever married her if she was such a horror. Yoshino, liked to dominate a lot and you could tell it by how the house was decorated. Everything was arranged according to her tastes because she liked the house to look a certain way and apparently, her opinion was the only thing that mattered. If you disobeyed her, you might not get away that easily – Alive! That woman sure was strict.

"You can still make it before she comes home."

"Alright… I'll get up now. Just give me a sec," Shikamaru said irritated, and Shikaku went downstairs to set up the dining table. Against his will, Shikamaru got out from his bed and dragged himself along to the bathroom with half sleepy eyes.

\- - -

As he was downstairs all cleaned up with his pineapple stalk hair, Shikamaru stood some feet away before the front door and began stretching and yawning very loudly. Simultaneously the front door had just opened and outside stood the person Shikamaru was a bit scared of sometimes.

That person had just returned home.

That person was his mother.

Yoshino carried big grocery bags making it impossible for her to see where she was going. However, she did not need any help from anyone and decided to walk all the way to the kitchen by herself. In that moment she took a step inside the house she pitched into Shikamaru who hadn't noticed his mother being back. Yoshino dropped all the bags onto the floor which made a gigantic mess around the entrée. Rubbing his forehead over and over again, Shikamaru opened his eyes widely, only to encounter a face slowly turning red. Her eyes flashed with anger, and frankly, if only eyes could kill, he would pretty much be dead in a heartbeat. Not knowing what to say because of the confusion reeling in his head, he just stared at his mother. He did not understand why she was so upset.

"Honey, you're home. What have you bought?" Shikaku stepped out from the kitchen wearing a pink apron.  
"Why don't you take a look then? It's all lined up neatly." She said sarcastically. "How many times do I have to tell you, Shikamaru? No running in the house!" Yoshino rose her voice.  
"I did no…"  
"Honey, don't get angry. Come and enjoy breakfast. I'll deal with Shikamaru later, okay?" Shikamaru got interrupted by his father. His tone sounded very stoically, "Shikamaru. Clean this up, will you?"  
"But..."  
"Now."

_I knew I should have stayed in bed! I knew it! The day has already started out terribly! What's next?_

\- - -

"Boiled egg…," His voice sounded surprised.

"Yes, you are going to eat it no matter what! You want to be smart, don't you? Then eat it! You are not leaving the table before you have eaten the egg!" Yoshino said commandingly to Shikamaru, who had an annoyed look on his face as he sat at the breakfast table. Boiled egg was the worst thing he could think of in the world. He simply despised it. Just the thought of feeling the consistency, the egg yolk running in his palate and swallowing it made his stomach upset. Scratch that, he  _abhorred_  it.

However, if he didn't eat it he would make another person upset. A very scary person indeed.

Shikamaru turned his head to his mother to beg for mercy. Nevertheless, Yoshino was cold as ice. Leaning back on her chair with her arms crossed she glared right back at him, waiting impatiently for him to eat the whole egg. A vein near Yoshino's left temple began to slowly reveal itself. Immediately, Shikamaru turned his head away from the terrifying twitch and stared at the boiled egg.

_Any other healthy food would do the trick like mackerel or kelp? For God's sake, why boiled egg?_

As a last resort to get help, he looked at his father who was sitting across the table next to Yoshino. But to Shikamaru's disappointment, Shikaku was not aware of the current situation which had been going on. At least it seemed that way. He just took sips of his green tea while enjoying it. Shikamaru then tried to catch his attention by kicking him under the table as hard as he could. Regrettably, Shikamaru kicked his mother at the shinbone instead. This time the look on Yoshino's face was even more horrifying than the expression she had at the entrée. Her eyes weren't just going to kill, this time it was out to destroy.

_Either I eat the stupid egg and be the good boy mom always "demands" me to be or I could stand up to her…_

"Well, I'm still waiting, Shikamaru. I'm not getting any younger by the minute, you know!" She said impatiently.

"I can see that," Shikamaru murmured. His father drank his tea calmly, still acting like nothing had occurred. Shikamaru thought for a second, before he answered. Actually, he should think it all through before he answered. Sighing Shikamaru said, "You win, mom. I'll eat it."

_It takes too much of my energy to argue with her anyway. Could use it on better things like sleeping._

"That's my boy!" She smirked in triumph, and in an affectionate move, pinched him on his check. She then left the table and took the dirty plates with her to the kitchen while Shikamaru poked the white jelly looking food with his teaspoon annoyingly.

"When you are done with your egg, go upstairs and clean up your room!" Yoshino's voice echoed from the kitchen.

"Yeah yeah… what?"

\- - -

"How troublesome!" Shikamaru took a quick scan of his room when he came back from breakfast. It was like a shinobi war had happened and all that had survived from the outcome was a big mess on the floor.

Shikamaru felt uneasy. Cleaning was not something he liked to do, simply because it took a lot of his time and energy. Groaning heavily, he began cleaning immediately. However, after a few minutes of picking up his own stinky laundry, Shikamaru got tired and decided to stroll to the only thing that was actually clean in his room - his bed. With no hesitation he threw himself on it. Laying his hands under the back of his head, he stared at the ceiling for a long time **.**

He needed a break from the cleaning.

He needed a break from the house.

He needed a break from all this in general, and by all this Shikamaru meant bossy women like his mother.

If only he could get an hour or two without his mother bossing him around, he would be in paradise. But the question remains: how? Sneaking out the front door won't do any good, because Yoshino would instantly hear the door being opened and know that it was him. Shikaku had already left Konoha for a mission and would not be back for a day or two, maybe even a week if Shikamaru was really unfortunate. That meant he was home alone with his mother. He started to think of other opportunities.  
"I could…," a sudden smash on the floor made Shikamaru jump up from his bed. It would seem that a crow had flown into his room and knocked down his vase. Shikamaru followed its movement out to the gutter and suddenly it hit him like a flash.

_I could escape through the window and climb down from the gutter. On the way home I can use the front door saying that I had to open it to send Naruto away or whatever. Hehe… I'll be back before she even knows it._

Without hesitation he climbed out of the window. Finally he was getting some time off from his frightening mother. He slowly slid down the gutter as quietly as possible but out of the blue he felt something heavy land on his head. Since it gave a cry, Shikamaru knew immediately that it was the same crow from before. It had thought that Shikamaru's black hair was a nest.

"Pssh, go away… Shush … Fly away you troublesome bird," the more Shikamaru struggled to get rid of it the more the crow fastened its grip on his scalp, "Ah, you stupid crow," he whispered, aggravated while pushing it aside so it would let go of his head. However, it made the situation only worse. The crow then got angry and started to peck his scalp continually. Out of irritation, he swung his arm with all his might at it but unfortunately, he missed, causing him to lose his balance.  
Hence, he found himself unable to regain his balance, meaning he fell right down to the ground and hurt his behind. At that moment, Shikamaru heard a scream inside his bedroom and the voice could only belong to one person.

"SHIKAMARU!"

The sound of his mother screaming, made the crow let go of Shikamaru's scalp and fled instantly up to the sky. Shortly, Shikamaru did the same feverishly. It was too late for him to go back…

\- - -

As he was some distance away from his house, he began thinking how troublesome not only his mother, but in general women actually were. Almost every woman, whom he had met up until now, wanted to have things their way. Furthermore, they were good at manipulation, got offended way too easily, were extremely scary when they got angry, always tended to use violence and last but not least, they liked to dominate over men whenever they got the chance to do so. Shikamaru shivered just at the thought of those women and after a few seconds, his mind drifted back to his mother again.

"Why does she always have to be all over the place? Does she really need to block my way every single time? I just want to do what I want to, which is sleeping, but I honestly feel trapped and cannot breathe because she is sucking all the air around me." Shikamaru exhaled noisily while looking down as he walked, not noticing the surroundings. A few steps away from him, the fat wife of the feudal lord heard what he said out loud. Jumping to the conclusion, for some unfathomable reason, she thought Shikamaru was mentioning her not-so-small size.

"Are you calling me FAT? You have some nerves calling me the f-word. Don't you know who I am?" she said angrily.

"Wha..? You have completely misunderstood me. I... I was not talking abo…" Shikamaru began to perspire at an incredible pace.  _Oh_ ,  _what have I gotten myself into?_

"I'll teach you a lesson or two on manners! Tora, after him!" The wife of the feudal lord cooed to her chubby brown cat with a Bordeaux-red bow on his ear, now pushing him to go after Shikamaru. However, it ran off in the other direction, relieved to get away.

"Tora… Tora…" the fat lady called after her cat crying, but that did not last for long. Her face changed drastically when she stared back at Shikamaru, "Look what you made my cat do! You've scared it to death. You are going to pay!" Suddenly the lord's wife commenced chasing after Shikamaru, which kick started the adrenalin inside of his body, causing him to run as fast as he could with a terrified expression.

Everybody on the streets was confused by the sight of them running, given that they ran past them many times.

"Get back here you little punk! Are you are a man or not?" The feudal lord's wife screamed.

"That's the problem Ma'am. I am only a boy if you haven't noticed that. I'm allowed to be a coward," Shikamaru said, thoroughly winded.

_For a fat lady, she can really run fast!_

They reached the park and bit by bit, after a couple of minutes of more running, the fat lady finally fell behind and to a certain extent, so did Shikamaru, but nonetheless, he had to continue. He  _would_  get his freedom no matter what, at least for a couple of hours, and then he would be happy to receive his punishment. Focusing on that thought deeply, Shikamaru did not notice a little short-haired blonde girl crossing his way in the park. Naturally, this resulted in him colliding fiercely into her.

"BAKA, Shikamaru! Don't you ever look at where you are going? My favorite blue shirt is all dirty thanks to you. AHHH!" Ino said furiously and got up quickly to show Shikamaru her fist indicating that she was ready to beat him up.

"Wait… wait, Ino? I'm sorry but you are not the only one here who is dirty. Would you look at me? I got bruises too?" Shikamaru said, still lying on the lawn all covered in dirt and mud.

"Are you saying that it's my fault now? Why you…"

"There you are, you little lout! DON'T… LET… HIM… GET… A…WAY!" the fat lady had finally caught up with him again, with her face turning into blue.

"No not this again. I just want a break." Shikamaru ran as fast as he could now, away from the place.

"Where do you think you are going? Get back here! I'm not done talking to you, BAKA!"

"DO AS YOUR FRIEND SAYS!"

Now Shikamaru had two females, or rather, two angry females after him. He ran through the newly blossomed park and out onto the busy streets again.

Turning his head back to see how far the ladies were, he began regretting it because not only were they close behind him, he encountered a frightening face coming from Ino. Shikamaru then realized that running was not the solution anymore. His strategy might have worked before but now that he had Ino chasing after him too, he had to change tactic. He had to get rid of them in a different way. The only solution he could come up with in such a stressful time was to hide – hide like a coward.

At the next crossroads, he saw a lot of people gathering around to see some circus performer perform. Shikamaru resolved to use that to his advantage. Pushing through the crowd, Shikamaru felt warm and smelly sweat dripping off the citizens' body onto his.

_Maybe I have not thought this plan through._

"Where is he?" a loud girl's voice said madly and tried to find a certain person. There was no doubt about it – the shrill voice belonged to Ino, "Just wait till I get you. Mark my words, Shikamaru Nara!" People turned their heads to see the strange furious girl walk away from the area wondering why she was so mad. They then looked at Shikamaru beneath them.

"Is she gone?" He asked and gasped for air. The adrenalin had slowly dropped, "That was close. Where did the lady go, I wonder? That's enough exercise for the rest of my life."

Exhausted and sweating like a pig, Shikamaru longed for his comfortable bed which, however, was out of reach at this moment. The sun kept shining brighter and brighter, making it difficult for him to come up with what to do next. If only he was under shades. Although after a while, he thought how stupid he was for not thinking about it earlier. Shikamaru had always considered it to be his other home in Konoha. The pavilion, which his father and his teammates had built on the top of a building, had always been a dear to him. It was not how the pavilion looked because it was nothing flattering. The little building consisted only of four posts, a flat roof and a bench, all made of old wood. No, it was what it symbolized of - manhood. If a woman had decided how it should be built, it would definitely not look like that. The pavilion was rough and ugly to look at but another reason why it meant a lot to Shikamaru was for the reason that his dad had built it with his friends. He, on the other hand, could never imagine himself doing such a thing because he was too lazy.

Immediately he ran up to his father's fine work and put himself on the hard but ground bench under the pavilion so he wouldn't get the shiny sun right in the eye. Feeling the cool fresh air touching his skin, Shikamaru felt free and unconcerned. He laid his arms under his head and fell right asleep.

\- - -

After several hours, the sun was about to set, Shikamaru woke up slowly and stared at the beautiful orange colored sky. It gave him inner peace just by looking at the clouds flowing by. Thinking about the incidents this morning broke the peace given that it led to Ino. He remembered the very first time he met her. It was at his place. Her father had paid Shikaku a visit and with him he had the blonde girl standing next to him. Shikamaru had just arrived downstairs when Ino suddenly said,  _'Who's that weird guy? I don't want to marry him, dad. He's not my type. Please, don't make me. You know Sasuke Uchiha, right? I love him!'_  
In that moment he got the impression that this girl was going to be troublesome and he was right.

_Ino! If I'm ever going to have a girlfriend which I certainly doubt that I do, she would definitely not be like you, Ino, oryou, mom. Too troublesome. No, she has to be sweet and caring and also not too ugly but not too pretty either._

"How can dad put up with mom all the time?" He talked to himself still staring at the colorful sky.

"That is because she's not that bad." A man stepped out from the shadows near the staircases. It was Shikaku, "I see you have retreated here all day," he smiled.

"Dad? How did you find me? What are you doing here? Aren't you supposed to be on a mis…"

"Take it easy son. I can't answer you if you don't let me talk." Shikaku paused and sat next to his son, "I got back early because of your mother."

"Mom?" Shikamaru looked puzzled, "She's fine dad. Last time I saw… correction last time I… heard her… she was screaming my name."

"Do you know why she screamed?"

"Yeah, she was mad because I left my cleaning behind…"

"No Shikamaru. She thought you were kidnapped."

"Kidnapped?" Shikamaru looked even more bewildered.

"Your mother heard some strange noise coming from your room, so she hurried up to check how you were doing but when she opened the door she found not a single soul. Since the vase was broken and the window was widely opened, she jumped quickly to conclusion that you were kidnapped." Shikaku explained it all with his hoarse voice, "So you see son. Your mother is not as horrible as you think she is. She really loves you."

"Then why is she always acting like she doesn't?" Shikamaru asked annoyed, "Why are women so mean all the time? It's hard to know what they are thinking."

"Yes, your mother has a funny way to show how she cares about you. But all those things she wants you to do are for your own good. When she yelled at you this morning for running in the house, she only did that because she didn't want you to get hurt. When she told you to eat your egg, she wanted you to become smart so you will get a bright future ahead of you. And when she told you to clean up your room, she was actually teaching you how to be independent and responsible. She may not show it directly but deep inside her heart, she has always treasured you, not hated you." Shikamaru looked down and was a bit ashamed.

"I understand. I should probably say sorry when I get back home. Thanks dad."

"Anytime, son. As for the question why women are mean… Well, that's a trick question that even I can't answer. Maybe because of their perio…" Shikaku stopped the sentence and looked at Shikamaru, "You don't know what I'm talking about, do you?" Shikamaru shook his head, "Well don't worry. You will eventually," Shikaku took a deep breath sounding relieved and then continued, "I have heard from the third Hokage that you have caused some serious trouble for the feudal lord's wife and little Ino today. Is that right? Tomorrow you are going to apologize to them too."

"But why dad? I did not do anything wro…"

"Listen son, just give the women what they want. It's a lot easier that way. Besides wouldn't you rather have a woman as a friend than as an enemy?"

"I guess you are right," Shikamaru said and sighed. This whole running away experience was not a waste of time after all. Shikamaru got to have this important talk with his dad and better yet, he got an insight of how his mom truly felt about him and how women were, but even so, it did not change the way he felt about the opposite gender.

"Hey dad?"

"Yes son?"

"Women are troublesome!"


End file.
